Happiness is not something one considers when dominating the rift with an entity so omnipresent like Ivern. But watching the enemy struggle against this abomination of a champ, does put a smile on my face. Champions try to fill a niche by fulfilling certain roles to help their team advance but in doing so they leave themself open to weaknesses. Ivern… he laughs at them... for he has no weakness.
Welcome to another dumb guide.

Ok, everybody stay calm, I SAID STAY CALM! This is it. The top of the food chain, the creature every horror movie stole its ideas from. The only reason there are other champions in League of Legends is because riot is trying their best to seal away the tremendous power hidden within this goofy looking tree guy.
This guide is not about losing your lp but instead offering your very soul for said lp by playing ivern.
So buckle up me fellows and grab your nearest bible while reading this.

The entity that would one day become Ivern was first mentioned in mural paintings dating back to at least 30.000 years BC. They showed a slender shilouette surrounded by something that might have been trees. Throughout history similar paintings were found all over the world. Different holy texts and stories formed around this creature. Though no one dared to ever speak its name – Gabnumbag. The name originated from an ancient civilisation that inhabitated most parts of europe, asia, the moon and certain parts of mexico. When they disapeared several milenias ago all they left for us are folklores and paintings of this deity. The name itself can be translated as „the one that eats the world“. Some linguists however say there was an error in the translation and it actually means „he, who likes strawberries in his pasta“.
After the middle ages when religion started to lose its power more and more scientists and extremely esoterics started to look into this forbidden knowledge. Do you think Da Vinci died a natural death? Do you think George Washington really died of illness? Do you think a certain austrian artist died peacefully in his bunker? All of them tried to comprehend the meaning of the creature mentioned by our ancestors.
To this modern day no one was able to decipher what this ancient civilisation tried to tell us. Little did the people who tried know, they were not worshipping him but rather lived in fear.
When the creature however was bored by the outter world he heard of a game called league of legends. Fearing that people would uninstall the game when they realized it was inhabitated by a demonic deity he changed his name into Ivern – the greendaddy.
When the cake speaks – the crumbles remain silent.

Friend of the Forest: allow your servants also called „jungle monsters“ to leave the rift since you don‘t need their help
Rootcaller: throw a barrage of godslaying vines at your enemy rendering them immobile F O R E V E R
Brushmaker: change the eco system itself by producing a forest enhancing your already allmighty autoattacks even further
Triggerseed: create an impenetrable shield that literally blocks more dmg than kayle r and obliterating nearby enemies when it expires
Daisy!: summon goon

Abilities

Items

Gabnumbag - God Ivern god, jungler, adc, „support“, toplaner, midlaner, greendaddy, adc, apc, tank, bruiser overall performance: godlike colour: green drip: dictator level of drip (more than 50 cent) Some Ivern facts - ivern loves ketchup - he is a heavy smoker - goon can solo dragons and baron nashor pre minute 43 - he is stronger than shrek and shaggy - games tend to crash when ivern hits level 14 - his favourite dinosaur was the brachiosaurus however since the movie „in a land before time“ his favourite dinosaur is the pteranodon - he is sexually attracted to goon - he has a pet ant called mohammed - he thinks the lord of the rings movies are boring and to long - his favourite food is a combination of petrol, eggs and concrete - when he is not murdering he likes to knit - he consumes about 7 litres of mountain dew a day - goon consumes 9 litres of mountain dew a day

Pros

+ looks like broccoli + literal god + probably a pimp + greendaddy

Ivern abilities are perfectly balanced. He has everything you could wish for. He is easy to play because of his O***** and is easy to build since every item fits him. But most importantly: he has a goofy voice and walks around like a cartoon character.

No. Well actually having 100% ban rate is kinda annoying.

go into the forest and set some jungle monsters „free“ (in reality they tekeport straight into his kitchen). Or murder some minions whose families will probably die of starvation without someone to provide money for them. Whoa that is dark now that i think about it.
If an enemy champ comes to close, remind them how little a life means to Ivern.

In mid game you have a tough decision to make. Do you just end the game or do you enjoy waching the enemy struggling until they surrender? Usually you should have around 450 farm at 20 minutes and about 50.000 kills.

I don‘t know man. You must have some specific fetishes if your game as ivern lasts that long.

I know what you think: „But hoesbeforebros69, ivern is not actually that strong nor is he a god!“.
WRONG, fool! He is that powerful and i am saying this because im am a strong believer in the greendaddy religion and not because Goon is holding my family hostage with shotgun, haha. By the way, you too can become a member of our cult, i mean religion, for just 49.99 pesos a month. To subscribe please follow this link (it is not a virus – greendaddy-word-of-honour): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fC7oUOUEEi4

Now go out there and make Faker himself rage like a 9 year old that is out of mountain dew and doritos. You will hit challenger in about 4 minutes! I tried it myself!
Peace.