Hello guys, I am The wingless messiah (no, I do not have wings) and I am writing this to guide you on the path of knowledge and eventually help you reach enlightenment. You should use this build with caution and only in the following case: you like looking like a pedo creep, taking first blood and giving cancer to the enemy team (since you are a disease carrying frog). Usually Tahm Kench is pretty annoying but with this build you can be the most annoying piece of ****. Cr*p. You will make your enemies and your teammates alike wail in despair. You thought Teemo is annoying, you thought Yasuo is annoying, well, they are nothing compared to Tahm Kench with this build. You want to have your enemies screaming out loud "HACKER", "WTF" and "LET ME PLAY FFS" at you? Then this build is for you.

I would appreciate any feedback and constructive criticism but if you are going to flame be ready to get flamed back (my middle name is Toxic and my first name is Very). Please let me know how this build and gameplay style work for you and point out any mistakes you find (be it spelling errors or terrible grammar or something else entirely). If you have some brilliant ideas as to how this build could be made even more op I am ready to hear them and take the credit.

Fish are tired of humanity's reign of terror. Human scum use pots, ovens and other immoral devices in order to dominate the waters. But now you have an opportunity that comes once in a lifetime, now you can have your revenge on all that human garbage. STOP THE ERA OF TERROR. The fishes strike back and it is your turn to choose on which side you will fight. Will you help sustain the tyranny that has led to so many deaths or fight for fish and bring anarchy on earth? I know what is my choice. Decide. But you better be wise because this decision will define the rest of your life. Lets put an end to all this misery the human mind has brought upon us.
And may the fish be with you

Pros + Great damage + Devour is good against tanks since it deals % of health damage + With all that attack speed it is easy to stack An Acquired Taste so you have lots of crowd control + Life steal (so much life steal) + Destroys the psyche of your enemies, leads to paranoia, schizophrenia and extreme fear from frogs and catfish + Almost indestructible in 1v1 fights unless you really screwed up early game or all the kills your team has are yours

Cons - Not much health - Vulnerable to CC - Not very mobile ( Zeal and Phage fix that) and vulnerable to ganks - Squishy - Dies fast if focused - Weak waveclear untill Statikk Shiv - NO ****ING HEALTH

I take Flash and Ignite since only weak people take Teleport. I mean why would you take it if you know that you can destroy your opponent with ease. Teleport is essentially a defensive spell used to get back on lane when you are low and have to recall. Plus Devour is basically a teleport. However I think Ghost is also a good choice.

Even though you build ad Tongue Lash and Devour still do good damage so max them first. And now as to how to use your abilities. I usually use Tongue Lash to start a fight by slowing my enemies so they cannot escape then stack An Acquired Taste, Devour them and finish them with a few autoattacks. If it is necessary I use Tongue Lash again to stun them. So your combo goes more or less like this: Tongue Lash aa aa Devour aa aa aa Tongue Lash or aa aa aa Tongue Lash and when the stun expires Devour. When you eat someone do not spit them unless you really have to, instead walk with them toward your turret or minions. And, of course, you can spit minions with Devour but I do not use it like that often. As for Thick Skin, use it whenever you are low and are about to get killed. BEWARE - when you ult EVERYONE sees where you ult so DO NOT try to be sneaky with it. Instead ult a little behind your enemies so they cannot escape ( they will often not even try to because they are unaware of your mad damage) and kill them. I also use my ult to take farm and defend or take towers.

I think it is obvious why I take Press the Attack (it works very well with your passive). Then I take Triumph because of the extra gold since with this build you really need all the gold you can get early game in order to dominate late game. It can also save your life from creeps and/or ignite after you kill someone. But Overheal might also be a valid choice because of your life steal. You can choose between Legend: Bloodline and Legend: Alacrity. And Last Stand is good since YOU HAVE NO HEALTH and it stacks really well with Thick Skin. Of course, I take domination because I want to dominate my enemies. Here you can choose between Cheap Shot, Taste of Blood and Eyeball Collection. I am not certain whether it is wise but you could also try Ravenous Hunter or Relentless Hunter. In my humble opinion Cheap Shot and Eyeball Collection are best though.

Now, THIS, is what distinguishes my incredible and extremely powerful Tahm Kench build from all the other Tahm Kench builds made for weak willed and ignorant people. You must start with Doran's Blade, a Health Potion and Stealth Ward in order to take first blood (I will explain to you how in the next section so please read it). It is nice if you can get B. F. Sword at your first back but if you have to recall earlier (getting first blood sometimes takes its toll) start Berserker's Greaves or Zeal or Vampiric Scepter. Your first big item should be Bloodthirster because of the damage and life steal. Your second Statikk Shiv because you really need the attack speed and it's passive since it gives you much better waveclear. With Statikk Shiv you can also strike a minion and if there is an enemy champion nearby the lighting might hit them. After this point you can improvise but i usually continue with Trinity Force because it is great and then Infinity Edge (you want that extra damage). As for the last item use your brain and decide for yourself. If they have tons of crowd control (CC) take Mercurial Scimitar. As for the defensive items, ignore them completely, I put them in there as a decoration.

So this is what you do when you spwan: you get your Doran's Blade go top and hide in the bush near the enemy tower. This is the part where you really look like a child abuser. If your jungler asks for help tell them ''I can't help you, I am waiting for the children to get out of the school bus". When the enemy laner comes you Tongue Lash them and then ATTACK!!! they will start running soon so after you have hit them three times and your Tongue Lash has come out of cooldown you stun them and finish them. You might have to use Ignite and/or Flash. I should tell you this does not always work - sometimes you have to let their top laner push a little before killing them and sometimes some other brainless human being might take first blood. Alternatively you can actually help your jungler then go in the river bush and do the same. Use wards because you are weak to ganks. If the enemy jungler attacks while your opponent is dead kill them. Here is what you do next: if you have to you recall then you kill your partner in war again and again and again till you reach level 6. When you are already level 6 you are fed like... well... like somebody who is really fed and you ult mid and kill their apc/mid assassin or whatever that guy is playing. After this you can go help bot or top again. Be careful with very mobile champions, though, because they will be hard to catch. Take in mind that this build is extremely aggressive and if you want to let your enemies control the game, do as they wish and destroy your very soul it is not for you. Try to kill at least two towers on your lane (I know you can do it)

Wait, what? Farming? Who farms nowdays anyway? After you have 4/5 kills in the 10th minute you do not really need a high creep score. But, seriously, you should try to farm while creep starving your opponent. When they try to farm Tongue Lash them and/or punish them with autoattacks, if there are not too many enemy minions nearby go full in (I am waiting for the punishment, I know it's on my way). When you get Statikk Shiv you can start pushing. Just be careful for ganks.

Here it gets harder because of your low health. If your team does not have a tank you are screwed. But do not despair, my friend. You can easily regen your health with your insane life steal. You do not start teamfights. You wait for someone else from your team to go in first (if you do not have a tank they will be the scapegoat) and go after them with the rest of your team, you try to focus their squishy targets and destroy them in a mere second. When one of them tries split pushing or some other stupid sh*t you can easily kill them with your ult. Also try flanking them and split pushing.

Yes. Yes, you should. You must. You have to. No joking, you should really try it out on ranked. But try it on draft or blind first to get used to it in order to minimize the flame you are going to get.

I would really like to include more videos but since I can include only 3 per section you will have to wait for God to enlighten me on as to how the hell I can make compilations

I am doing solo Baron here and I do not even have full build yet:
Play Video

ok, my other vids got deleted for some reason. Well **** it.

I want to thank jhojhoi for her guide to making a guide. And I should mention that I took some of Toxic Fiora's phrases. If now you are like who the **** is Toxic Fiora, well they are a human I presume. I ,also, want to thank Slipknot... and Korn... and Slice The Cake... and you get the idea.